It’s not that I’ve often taken leave of my senses but that I can never take a hint

Note that the male tes– tes are exactly the size of small potatoes

The ugly duckling Is not a duck But he is a lucky duck

The crucial moment in my elevator pitch comes when I hit the emergency stop button

I don’t meet many people with a mind like a steel trap Instead, the really smart people tend to have minds like trawling n… to catch the really big fish

Relationships are hard work unless you’ve preemptively announc… that you’re quitting but staying on as a volunteer

My wife now relates to me very much as she does to stinky cheese

In the state of nature You live by the sword And die by the sword In civilization The pen is mightier

The wonder of it all includes everything worth loving but also everything that must be endured So, I wonder about

Heads you take the risk Tails I take the reward i.e., Out of many risks, one fortune

In an online community You don’t have to commute But your sins will never be commut…

Home isn’t Where you go And they have to take you in No such place exists Home is

In a real life version of the ugly duckling discovering h… I was the reject popsicle stick who at long last found out I was a handy tongue depressor

The New Revised Standard Version… A frenemy of yours is a frenemy of… whereas the New King James Versi… The frenemy of my frenemy is my fr…

I used to believe that if no one was unwanted there would be no more Wanted post… Now I think that because we can never stop wanting