One of the great things about bein… Or, in my case, becoming Jewish Is that every Jew has a voice So, you would be forgiven for thin… Two Jews, two opinions

My matchmaker couldn’t find me any… but she suggested I go to the bing… and focus on the woman who played the most cards per game

Human beings have always used the symbolic to navigate the real; until recently we did so by imagining that the symbolic is rea… whereas scientists imagine that

A fair competition Is one in which No one can win So that everyone Has an equal chance

Soft totalitarianism is like shoes That are just tight enough To remain comfortable If you don’t go anywhere

I remember saying to myself Okay, this is it the moment of truths

Only a fool believes that the river obeys the riverbed

If you do the right thing you won’t be rewarded but you will be enabled

The cold war was a just war but a just war is still just war and war is hell

Those who can do talk shows Those who can’t teach others to show, don’t tell

Because the Real is unimaginable effective liars exploit what people want to be true– This is known as the Unreal But the opposite of the Unreal

My biggest mistake In fantasy football Is expecting today To be like yesterday Come to think of it

To elide is to join together by omitting The world elides Jews abide

When I started telling my employe… Apologies in advance! they still felt compelled by decor… No apologies needed which was how I ended exploitation

When I was a kid we thought the end of the world was coming any minute via The Button Instead it came a little later