Friendly competition is heaven on… Culture war is hell on wheels Of time But now that our culture’s wheels… We’ll soon be out of time

You could say I tried stand-up but for the audience it was more like when the flight attendant demonstrates how to put on your own oxygen mask…

If you’ve seen one mirror you’ve seen them all

If your phalanges cause you to philander pluck off the ring

If you want a world that isn’t just a bunch of window dressing don’t have a world in which we’re all constantly being window…

Thinking that the purpose of life… things looked good enough on the s… to believe that my life was 24-karat gold Who knew that the purpose of beaut…

There are No shortcuts On an Infinite journey

Charlie Brown wants To believe Lucy wants To deceive But maybe, just maybe

When life gives white people lemon… they make ginger tea lemonade wit…

Paper comes from trees but when money was made of paper we all agreed that money doesn’t grow on trees

There’s only one way To win a game of chicken But there are two ways to lose And the only chance of victory Is knowing ahead of time

A rising tide lifts all boats But a rising sea floods all moats

An uninterrupted winning streak Can only be had through An unchanging mean streak

The truth is true Is a tautology The truth is untried and true Is an etiology

When I stand before this world I’m afraid to say What I have to ask you About my desire: “Is that too much to ask?”