Life = Trial by fire Death = Trial by firing squad

Hell is other people Purgatory is other people’s money Heaven is money

Riddle me this: The Riddler commits crimes of the… By loving each and every one of us… But always leaves clues behind In the form of a riddle

My wife fell right back in love with me when we came up with a rubric

Where once man strove to move mountains now he settles for making them

When America was grouped by right… We could always meet in the middle… This was called democracy But those days are over With America divided into

I’ve wasted most of my life wondering Why do I believe in God? when I should have been asking Why does God believe in me?

If you can get what you want you’re selling yourself short

Living in the Information Age is… looking at a Pointillist painting but you can’t connect the dots

My biggest mistake In fantasy football Is expecting today To be like yesterday Come to think of it

There are two kinds of people in t… Those who believe in God And those who believe in God But also believe in God You can tell the latter

I know the world is round from experience: I ran from the truth for so long that I ran smack into it

There is the rule of law Which is self-explanatory Or there is the law of rule Which will always be explained to…

No one seems to see (least of all me) that being all you can be isn’t about clutching superiority– it’s for abjuring mediocrity

People want the lockdown to be enforced with facial recognition technology because they don’t recognize thems…