Now that I’m wearing a mask I find myself telling strangers everything

If we had our druthers We would be insufferable Instead, we suffer As if desire were a curse And not our saving grace

Most tautologies are self-fulfilling prophecies For example: Most people are average But God never met

Because a man is only as good as h… you’ll know he means what he says when you see him do it But on social media a man is only his words

We put tracking collars around ani… We put smartphones in our hands And in holding them We have our hands around our necks

You both cause and cure real self-… by performing fake self-loathing for an online audience The cure takes when you’ve no authentic self left

It should come as no surprise when the Emperor with no clothes e… Off with their threads!

Just as a lucky horseshoe works Whether you believe in it or not As long as the competition to pass… Goes on forever Then everyone’s a winner

If Star Wars is actually told From R2-D2’s perspective Then our only hope Is that God lets us go on believi… We are more powerful

Thinking of happiness as the meaning of life is like thinking of sugar as the meaning of food

When a woman chooses her mate His first real test Is whether he accepts her dare To propose If he does, we already know her an…

Aristocracy failed because it couldn’t keep some of the people happy all of the time Democracy is failing because

At work They know me by my secret identity The mild-mannered Clark Kent But at home with my family I can relax and let them see the r…

It’s not just that The civilization I was born into Is gone– This probably happens To most of history’s long-lived

The sixth extinction was hardest of all on the balloon animal artists