People who enter a plea of I’m sorry if you were offended are bargaining for a sentence of time served reckoning they’ll have got off sco…
On a sphere If you drill down far enough Eventually you will find yourself Drilling up to the surface So, while we may never get to the…
You need a high in– come to claim the moral high ground on your taxes
It’s taken me this long to underst… like Pee Wee Herman I meant to do that though I’m still unsure why Because as hard as it’s been
Part 1- Who am I? A missing person Where’s my place? It’s where I must stay
A grown up is someone who knows the right thing to do and does it anyway
They used to give me Birthday presents Now they give me A wide berth
We can all agree that life is the number one cause of death But no one wants to admit that death is the only cause of ne… Nevertheless, we love our children
People don’t like surprises so I tell them they’re in for a real surprise which gives them something to look…
The fatal mistake Is taking his weakness For kindness
If dreams are the fulfillment of wishes you aren’t allowed to make then daydreams are the fulfillment of wishes
In Putin’s version of Let’s Make… he shows you what’s behind Door #1… - You let Putin run you through w… AND what’s behind Door #2: - You fall on your sword to atone…
I am not who I think I am I am not who you think I am And I am not even who I think you… I am who I-Am-Who-I-Am thinks I…
Hell is other people Purgatory is other people’s money Heaven is money
The biggest stumbling block in bel… that God is in control is further accepting that He put us in charge
