Some families hide the truth in pl… By laughing at it Although it gets confusing for a c… When the truth is a joke That can’t be told
My wife I mean my life Is a fulfillment of dreams Where I wish I were wearing pants
The Fed has one lever to pull– interest rates– to keep all of us consuming
Globalization is the Titanic The United States dollar is the hull that keeps the Titanic af… And US debt default is
I can only ever seem to do the math in the aftermath
A man wants the mother of his children to be a chef in the kitchen “imaginative” in the bedroom a shrink in the living room
I brought a wife To a gun fight Don’t worry You haven’t met my wife
If you want to ruin a man give him what he wants– This is the devil’s only secret
I thought I was Playing to the crowd When all along I was getting Played by the crowd The crowd, it turns out
Originally it was about Michael Bike and called Bike Rider
I’ve done the math and the whole is only greater than the sum of its parts when the group is made up of individuals
I couldn’t believe that my first e… was still carrying a torch for me and then I saw all my other ex’s b… carrying a pitch fork
Don’t think of a pink elephant and while you’re at it Don’t kill the messenger
As bumbling first mate to his capt… Gilligan wasn’t in charge But he was the star of the show Which is how the male ego understa…
Late capitalism compensated for it… by blending it into its own propri… No one can redeem the past But everyone can redeem coupons!
