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Chris Gaither

Chris Gaither

The Only Subject in Middle School Used to Be Social Studies; Now It’s Religious Studies

Because we are social beings
whenever people said they have no life
they always meant they have no social life
 
Real life was social life
 
But now social life is short for
social media life and
 
Unreal life is social life
 
So these days when someone says
they have no life
they just mean they are alive

Other works by Chris Gaither...
Love Comes After Acceptance

The three most powerful words in the English language are not I love you; they are So be it
“Now that production on chips has ramped up enough to supply the outsized demand, the biggest limiting factor to AI’s growth going forward, according to Musk, is finding enough electricity to power the data centers where those chips are put to use.”

“The human body generates more bio…
Tell It Like It Is

Jews will tell you Right up front That they believe They are the chosen people WASPs believe that they believe
Neo Is the One but Trinity Is Me and You as Us

The narrative arc of the Matrix m… appears to be about man vs. machin… when really it’s about resolving man vs. woman: A man must learn
God Is a Net; We’ve Chosen the Internet

If you make the mistake of believi… there’s no room for error the surest way to avoid making ano… is to keep making the same mistake
 2
Take Too

The original version’s working title was The Giveth and Taketh Away Tree but Silverstein couldn’t get it published
A Certain Je Sais Quoi

It has taken countless scholars decades of toil to translate Plus ca change, plus c’est la meme chose
The Internet’s Primary Function Is to Weaken the Will of the People; to Accomplish This All of Its Other Functions Make Life So Much Easier

In true democracy Authority flows via The will of the people In our technocracy Authority grows via
Social Being

I know what I want But do I want everyone else To know what I want That is the question
If We Just Retrieve What We’ve Already Learned, the Golden Age Will Be a Fait Accompli

Post-pandemic life is like being a… Who comes home only to find Her parents have replaced Her obviously dead goldfish With a new one
It’s Official: It’s Alive!

In the official version of my life I love my life In real life I love life itself
The Before, the After, and the Beautiful

Let’s call the before times “The… It’s not what you know It’s who you know But after the social media It’s not who you know
Because, Of Course, It’s All Over

I won the day when my antagonist branded me a reactionary because, of course, I’m an overreactionary
If I’m Serving My Ego Does That Make Me a Servant Leader?

One problem with civilization is that the people drawn to power are precisely those who lack it
“Belief is that upon which one is prepared to act”

In real life we used to say I’ll see your talk and raise you action but that was just too risky Preferring no stakes



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