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Chris Gaither

Chris Gaither

Serpent, You Bore Us; Time for Ouroboros!

The bell curve is the Serpent
With the lump in the middle
Who ate Adam and Eve
By convincing us we’re all mostly average
 
But we’ve proven indigestible
So, the Serpent has a new tact–
Now we’re all above average
But cyberspace ain’t Lake Wobegon
And all the women are wrong
While all the men are onlooking
 
Here’s the old reliable news:
Ever famished, the Serpent intermittently goes for its own tail
Which we can grasp and pull ourselves out
If only we realize–
When we too are One
There is no such thing as average

Other works by Chris Gaither...
Happiness, H-A-P-P-I-N-E-S-S, Happiness

Whoever said It’s lonely at the top must have never had their own spelling group in third grade
Materialism Is a Bureaucracy

Bureaucracy’s biggest sin Is malingering as democracy– Bureaucracy sees the will of the p… As a form of madness But pretends to follow the will of…
We Have an Arranged Marriage

Some people have baggage; I come with furniture Fortunately, my wife enjoys rearranging
Mutually Assured Tax Deduction

Much like nuclear weapons the whole point of having vacation days is never to use them
We Used to Protect Our Sources; Now We Protect Ourselves

In the analog it was enough to consider the source Now, in the digital you must consider the source code:
You Will Never Find a More Wretched Hive of Pride and Prejudice and You Will Never See the Knife in Your Back

In polite society The most threatening words are alw… I’m disappointed in you Which is politesse for There’s a knife in you
Freud Spilled the Beans but the Clean-up Is Almost Complete

For about one hundred years it was no longer a secret that the easiest way to be a rational a… in an irrational world is to rationalize all
A Chicken and Egg Situation

Self-flattery will get you everywhere but there’s nowhere left to go
Haiku

The path to victo– ry begins with laughing at yourself in defeat
 1
We Can Talk Our Way Out of This, but It Has to Be In-person

There is a place Where children are to be seen And not heard Where all the children are raised To keep up appearances
Desire is the Sixth Stage of Grief

Just as Tastes like chicken is code for I only want chicken I don’t know what I want
Why All the Cowardly Lyin’?

We have religion for the heart and science for our brains but the head and the heart are afraid of each other because there’s nothing for the ne…
The Trial

Life is a trial in which the more you obey the guiltier you become Miraculously
Nothing Makes Sense Until It All Makes Sense

Our souls have a body Our bodies have five senses And we all have a sixth sense That there is no sixth sense Yet we’re left with a sense of sel…
Catwoman Loves Batman but Has to Settle for Copycatman

It’s a lot easier for men to dwell in the mystery of what a woman wants than to acknowledge what it is exactly that



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