The only way to become friends And stay friends Is to spend time together Is it any wonder, then That pandemic lockdowns

Nobody wants to feel left out And we’ll do anything to stay in Which is why most people have inni… Right by their guts Because trusting your gut

The depths of despair will be alleviated to the degree of your depths of attachment

I’ll never forget when a guy standing in his front yard confronted me about looking into parked car windows mistaking me for a car thief

The bad news is that liberal societies can only cohere in the face of external enemies The good news is that we will never lack for

Just when you think You’ve seen it all It all falls apart So, you put it back together again Thinking this time it’s forever

In my experience it’s not necessarily true that one plus one must equal two The sum is nearly always

When I caught my wife cutting up… she said it was to prevent birds getting stuck in them like six-pac…

Can’t buy me love but you can buy me likes

When Mao said “Everything under heaven is in utt… he went on to kill 60 million of h… When Xi Jinping said “Everything under surveillance is…

My biggest mistake In fantasy football Is expecting today To be like yesterday Come to think of it

Like NFL Hall-of-Famer Dick Ve… I’m a Scorpio So, like Coach Vermeil I also tend to cry whenever I spe… About the things that matter most…

The internet is the opposite of th… When a memory is repressed you get it back even though you can’t remember it But when it is memory-holed

I have a tendency to overreact When people tell me to get lost By taking them literally and serio… Which is literally how I found Go… Seriously!

Faced with a forced choice The agnostic feigns ignorance For if you ask a woman to marry yo… And she says I don’t know