It’s not that we’ve abolished death but we’ve made it a mere formality

One would think the earth is flat “Unless” as the Coen brothers put it “round is funny”

The original version’s working title was The Giveth and Taketh Away Tree but Silverstein couldn’t get it published

The American cure for the boredom of meaninglessness is not to pursue meaning but to outpace boredom which is why our mass nihilism

Socialists count on the fact that there are no private languages but there is

Accustomed to the view from their… the rich had no idea they were fas… a very steep waterfall

God’s abundance Enables the agency of knowing when… While the devil’s overabundance Leaves you unprepared to exercise… To wit

If I said– The worst thing you can say about… is that he always plays it safe– then he sounds like a perfectly ni… But when I say–

Whistler’s mother had just spent a long day with Whis– tler’s mother-in-law

Pacifism is the ultimate weapon For if you can prohibit your enemy From defending himself Then all that’s left Is to love him to death

Life = Trial by fire Death = Trial by firing squad

You can only give what you are wil… See God Who gave us responsibility Because He takes responsibility f… And those who place blame

The first difference between your… When you know your boss’s eyes are… You need to look busy But when you know God’s eyes are… You actually want to get busy

Heads I bite my tongue Tails You cut it off

I used to stand on the moral high ground to look myself in the eye but now that I’ve plucked it out and thrown it away