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Chris Gaither

Chris Gaither

In the English Language We Have 100 Words for Throwing Up, and My Favorite Is Chunder

Told to shut my mouth
I took them literally
Zipped my lips
And held my breath
Until I could stomach it no longer
And threw up in my nose
In a reflux redux
Where nausea is no longer
Doubting your own existence
But ceasing all resistance

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Autres oeuvres par Chris Gaither...
What Are You Willing to Never Die For?

War gave way Not to peace But to endless meetings
The Best Advice I Ever Got

My matchmaker couldn’t find me any… but she suggested I go to the bing… and focus on the woman who played the most cards per game
I Predict a Riot

No one ever told the truth but not a one of us were liars because we always spoke exclusivel… in the future tense
In Becoming a Jew One of the First Things I Learned Is That a Jew by Any Other Name Is Still a Jew

The only ones Who antisemites hate more than Je… Are Jews who defend themselves There is a name For their belief system:
I Walk Three Steps Back and Three Steps Forward When I Daven so That It Becomes My Daily Constitutional

When the people believe The Constitution protects and uph… Their varying beliefs But when the people don’t believe Embracing nihilism by replacing G…
“Hear me now and believe me later”

There are no atheists in foxholes; the world is a foxhole
Exiled on Easy Street

Because I never learned anything… I learned the hard way that it’s the only way to learn anything at all
The Big Picture

I’ll give you the forest And I’ll take the trees You save the whales And I’ll keep the bees The sand in your eyes
Eventually, Cyborgs Will Live Forever, but We Can Send Our Condolences Now

Of what value Would be my love If I could not Give my life for it Our (patent) pending immortality,…
John Baltimore Sings “Mt. Sinai, Chai!”

I was born in the summer of my 47th year coming home to a place my mazel’d ever been before
The World Has Many Religions but Just One Ism: Favoritism

When I was a child Parents sent their kids Outside to play Now we treat children Like little adults
Save Us From the Time of Trial

I used to pretend that Kafka’s The Trial was my favorite book but these days I bring a courtroom stenographer with me
Words Spread

Every writer has mistaken his shotgun for a rifle– He may hit where he aims but he will also surely miss In discharging his will to power
I’ve Died and Gone to Eruv

It’s said that In my Father’s house are many man… Which makes sense to me now That I’ve been banished from my f… And left for dead
Part of Me

I want to believe in God I believe in UFOs I don’t believe in recycling I don’t want to believe in what th…



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