While I was waiting for them to come to their senses they came to my house
Women give hints So that men will think It was their idea I’ve never been good at taking a h… But I’m good at following orders
The moment of truth has come and g… Leaving us with the whole truth: The best and worst is yet to come When there will be nothing but the… And you will only know the best fr…
When I run out of things to do I write an itinerary: When all else fails fill sandbags to convert
I can’t guess your age but I can guess your age when you got that tattoo
In the old country song When Mac Davis sings “Oh lord it’s hard to be humble When you’re perfect in every way” I always assumed
People think artists are painting, dancing, writing, or… when really they’re all whistling past the graveyard
Beware the self-loathing salesman who loves what he does– If you buy what he’s selling then you bought it because you broke it
Can’t buy me love but you can buy me likes
Life is a talent show where most everyone is doing bad versions of easy impressions
Like Coke for Coca-Cola, Mr. Pibb is short for Mr. Pibb, ABD
Average academics Have a pet theory Dominant academics Have a pet theory about pet theori…
The Cookie Monster is just living up to the name Kermit gave him
Our elites believe That the key to holding their grip… In the face of domestic opposition… Wringing their necks While in the face of external thre…
The wonder of it all includes everything worth loving but also everything that must be endured So, I wonder about
