I always thought saying slide trombone was like saying pizza pie until I heard about the valve trombone

They let Potter get away with any… but somehow I get expelled for flo… that a wizard can’t have the same… even though zero (magic) is only half as large as double ze…

You can’t break the chain of events but you can break the chain of custody for the chain of events

The pleasure of a new discovery is only exceeded by the satisfaction of making a recommendation

The pursuit of fame is the human equivalent of a dog chasing its own tail

Is being a conformist without a cause enough to qualify me as an antihero

The revolution will be permanent When nobody means what they say But everybody memes what they say

There is only one way to claim moral authority: Convincing others that they are the authority in their own life And based on exhaustive research

If my wife could re-draft she says she’d still take me but only after trading back to the second round

After that instead of talking about the weath… or staring at their phones people stared at anyone who talked

When you have to be rich just to be middle class what do you have to do to be rich? That’s what they call a good quest… And since you have no choice

Life isn’t fair But we are all equals In the struggle To stay out of judging others For failing at their struggles–

If you need to appear weak to access power you’ll end up weak-kneed and abuse your power

The first half of life: If it ain’t broke Don’t fix it The second half of life: If you can’t fix it

Socialism insists You should want what you need Capitalism connives To make you need what you want When in truth