Everyone thinks Vladimir and Estr… stay together because they’re both waiting for Godot when really it’s their mutual disdain for Wile E. Coyote

A record sounds the same every time you play it A broken record is intolerable because it isn’t broken, it’s just…

When I was young we always said If you’re gonna be a bear be a grizzly bear! But now everyone’s become

I was always afraid to admit I knew they would knife me in the… Until I came to fear God Which is how I know He has my back

Lunch is born free but everywhere is in chain restaurants

The cold war was a just war but a just war is still just war and war is hell

And then it hit me: My lone flaw is not admitt– ing to any flaws

Because there is no I in lions, if a lion could talk, it couldn’t say I Which is to say, a lion can starve but never lacks,

People thought they could finally come and go as they pleased if they could just be rid of the g… only to find in their absence not just more and bigger gates

The blood-brain barrier is semiper… Because your heart pumps out love By the truckload

The devolution to a permanent ruling class of the progressive educated elite will not be televised Because the elite cut their cords

Instead of dismantling oppression we dismantled the printing press inaugurating the Information Age when no news is good news all information is disinformation

My shampoo is nine– ty nine percent natural, as if that were enough

Imagine all the things They wouldn’t allow If they were invented now Anything fast: No motorcycles

Antizionism feels powerful Because it claims the authority Of giving permission to hate But the feeling is soon vanquished Requiring another hit of hate