Wittgenstein let the fly out of the bottle but western philosophy was soon back on the bottle

The quartermaster is responsible f… and nothing more Some of you will be content to half-ass the rest of it Some of you will be willing to ris…

Faced with a forced choice The agnostic feigns ignorance For if you ask a woman to marry yo… And she says I don’t know

I know I think, Therefore I am All knowing Unless

Until the company’s weekend retrea… I didn’t know that my leadership s… was like never having braces but still wearing a retainer

If I said– The worst thing you can say about… is that he always plays it safe– then he sounds like a perfectly ni… But when I say–

What is the culture war really bei… The battlefield is littered with c… Those clues are our dead bodies That still walk And talk

Would my dentist still want me to floss if he knew that’s how I justified not going to the dentist

At first everyone was to be followed by a p… to protect us from terrorists or kill us if we were terrorists But then it was decided that

Mating For Life Saved My

We got the five day work week because that’s how long it takes a python to digest it’s meal

John F. Kennedy’s hair was so lus… for the most part men never wore hats again At first we must have looked oddly like tub…

Pressure is wanting it for someone else Passion is wanting it

The truth is true Is a tautology The truth is untried and true Is an etiology

Our big mistake is thinking a leap of faith is a tandem parachute jump where God pulls the parachute and you float gently down