Physicists insist that time can flow both forward and backward So, I always insist on sitting in the backward facing seats of th… because I need to be able to see

When they drew a winner It looked like we’d won By the luck of the draw But we came by our good fortune The honest way:

My utopia is a dystopia where I get to say I told you so

Ours was the first all you can eat… to earn a coveted Michelin star and I always thought it was becaus… when you ordered the whole enchila… it came with bottomless fries

When I die I’m go– ing to donate my body to pseudoscience

The sooner we realize that wholeness is impossible the sooner we can redouble our efforts towards obtai…

Living during COVID-19 Was like trying to eat A bag of individually wrapped M&M…

The difference between a materiali… Is that a materialist finds it rat… That dark matter and energy must b… Because it makes their calculation… But fears they’ll never find it

It’s come to my attention that My attention span is limited By what I want to see And like most people these days I don’t know what I want

You start out needing money to advance your ideology but you end up mouthing your ideol… to rake in more money

The difference between poisonous snakes and venomous human beings is that when the snake bites you and explains

I may not be deep but I compensate for it by getting deep into the weeds

The older I get the less I pause for effect This is because the clock is ticking and I’d rather not waste my time

Love may never win but love always ties

When my father-in-law dusted the cobwebs off our front p… they were back within the week It is hard to feel sorry for a spe… that has negligible capacities for…