Rainbow Cup
For Love
Gracious, have I ever been so lost?
Stumbling, over and over, I begin again,
My words are my shield and sword, though I know what I think has a terrible cost.
Damn, why don’t you see what I see?
Love has never been a choice for me
Emotions white out my logic, maybe I can change, be part of a different people.
A people of hate? I know I’d rather be blinded, and I truly would be,
to fall into the hands of that evil.
I find myself wandering in the words as I speak,
Drowning in your mis-guided pools of deceit.
Loss is a painful endeavor, one that I will journey on many times.
Love is everything I believe in,
Why must you babble hateful lies?
Not a monstrosity, not a choice, I would whisper.
You’d say: What about fags and their sinister slither?
You’re not sure if you can save a soul as far gone as mine.
Only doesn’t that go against everything you believe in?
I suppose we’ll all know in due time.
Although I have no God watching me, I will never give up.
I need no God to tell me I may drink from the rainbow cup.
(2011)
I wrote this after dating a boy who wanted to make me a Christian housewife rather than the purple haired activist I was. He was a childhood sweetheart, and I wanted to achieve the innocence I'd had back when we dated the first time. Unfortunately, I was not only unable to commit to his ignorance, I also was unable to recommit to my own.
#ActivismConflictingDisagreementGayGodIdeasPrideRainbowReligiousRomance
