Krazy Lulu

Regret

It’s with each regret that I fall harder,
 
deeper into a world I know isn’t good.
 
I find bad decisions have a luring sweetness,
 
and I don’t fight hard against it like I should.
 
 
It’s like the Devil is giving out candy,
 
saying, “Just one more– just one.”
 
But we all know, one turns into many,
 
and before you know it, you’re done.
 
 
Sometimes I wonder to myself,
 
Why wasn’t God there to save me?
 
I believed He should’ve warned me,
 
before I drowned in this deceiving sea.
 
 
People give me looks, disapproving,
 
with half-assed smiles that never last.
 
As if they believe I can change what I’ve done–
 
as if being judgmental will make me change my past.
 
 
I’m swimming up, but falling down,
 
with a special hole readily placed in Hell.
 
I understand what I did, I regret what I’ve done,
 
with each mistake ringing as clear as a bell.
 
 
This world is dark and arrogant,
 
throwing knives of lonesome and hate.
 
Regret fills your lungs with every breath,
 
and you realize the better decision too late.
 
 
You may look around,
 
and see others hating you.
 
But you have to remind yourself,
 
they did a lot of bad things like you.
 
 
When you get stuck in a place,
 
where you can’t trust many,
 
snide remarks and acid words,
 
are our defense against the needy.
 
 
Patience is the key to surviving in this world,
 
where everyone sins and hates because of their sin.
 
I hurt, you hurt, and we all hurt with regret.
 
But it’s the world that we must live in.
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