Poeticous Logo
en
English Español Français Italiano
Chris Gaither

Chris Gaither

My Wife Loves a Challenge and My Wife Loves Me; You Do the Math

Women give hints
So that men will think
It was their idea
 
I’ve never been good at taking a hint
But I’m good at following orders
So, when my wife tells me
She doesn’t like it when I bring her flowers
I can follow orders by taking the hint:
This isn’t going to be easy
(Which is how I know it’s not my idea)

Other works by Chris Gaither...
The Ayes Are the Window to the Sole Acceptable

Everything dear to you? You can take all of that and throw it out the Overton window
Haiku

As Amazon Prime Minister I’m ringleader of the carefree world
Antisemitism Is Black Magic

The latest version of antisemitism takes the form of a magic trick: The diversion– Antisemitism is bad The illusion–
The Neighborhood of Make Believe

We’ve gone from treating people as a means to an end to using them as props for pretend
With Apologies to Yoda and Samuel Beckett, There Is No Try, There Is Only Try Again

God knows that the only thing you can give the man who has everything is another chance
Poetry Is Like Farting in Public

Because bodies make a fart joke of… etiquette used to dictate that whe… passed gas at, e.g., a dinner part… the polite thing to do was to pret… the fart never happened
Why All the Cowardly Lyin’?

We have religion for the heart and science for our brains but the head and the heart are afraid of each other because there’s nothing for the ne…
Living in Harmony with Nature in the Gig Economy

At night in the city you can only see three stars but you still have to give them five stars
“Tank. I need a pilot program for a B-212 helicopter. Hurry.”

The ego is a helicopter equipped to safeguard belonging deter conflict and elevate status
Whither Brute Force?

At bottom God is a brute fact and Satan a brutal fact
Breathe

If you made a Venn Diagram of my office and a coal mine the only thing you’d put where the… is the canary we keep by the copie… If the canary is dead
 1
Slide Away

I always thought saying slide trombone was like saying pizza pie until I heard about the valve trombone
Who Wears Short Shorts?

With the sexual revolution as with all the other belief syste… what men take as an article of faith women have to wear
A Consonant Question

Consider the vowel: In Marxism, the last shall remain… as the second A in materialism always becomes the second E in mat… And in capitalism, of course
Haiku

We have achieved the classless society: eve– rything is tacky



Top