My wife is a lot like God If God weren’t perfect Like Him, she’s my toughest criti… But also my fiercest champion
On Fresh Air they always mention that their rock historian lives in France as if he were in exile from rock a… the same way James Joyce wrote ab…
You can only e– ver explain things with that which cannot be explained
Where once I feared death Now I fear that Death will be anticlimactic
In all my years as warden I could never figure out how to co… with NFPA code 14.14.1.5.1- “Access to exits shall be marked b… readily visible signs in all cases…
It was when Socrates ate the frui… that he added this second line of… I know that my wife knows everythi…
Do me a favor and riddle me this: Is he favored to win Because he’s our favorite Or is he our favorite Because he’s favored to win?
When I ask myself if I might be wrong, there’s a whole lot of red tape
The bell curve is the Serpent With the lump in the middle Who ate Adam and Eve By convincing us we’re all mostly… But we’ve proven indigestible
When I picked candy apples as my… (think spirit animals for foodies) I honestly had no idea I was naturally sweet but laid it on way too thick
In this charming reboot of a classic kidlit gumshoe series our eponymous hero Wikipedia Brown solves thought crimes by
I remember saying to myself Okay, this is it the moment of truths
On a gray scale Of one to ten I’m a perfect five
You’ll know it’s the Fountain of… when you dive in to get it over wi… endure the shock, but then you never get used to it
Home isn’t Where you go And they have to take you in No such place exists Home is
