Anastasia

Supporting Role

I’ll never be that girl, your eyes will never glimpse at the sight of me.
You’ll keep searching in the room for someone different, not as common.
I’ll try to exchange some words but at the end of the night, you’ll leave with someone else.
I’ll forever be damaged goods, the girl who inevitably ruins everyone’s night.
 
I’ll be forever the girl who attracts chaos even if I still sleep with stuffed animals.
Impulsiveness will attach to me, a hurricane you can’t prevent or stop.
I’ll cry at the subtlest tone of voice, I’ll bite my nails until they bleed.
I’m not meant to be that free soul, I am a shadow, collecting polaroids.
Still writing on paper with pink ink and hearts instead of dots at the of the sentence.
 
But I’m not lovely, I’ll hide pills in my pillow to feel safe for some odd reason.
I’m going to pour vodka into a bottle of water and pretend I’m okay.
I will wake up in the middle of the night, screaming over nightmares.
My destiny is to play a supporting role when at the end of the day I’m alone.
And it’s my fault. For being such an unpredictable and clingy being.
 
I don’t blame anyone for walking away from my life when I can barely stand myself.
When all I desire is to crush the reflection of the mirror and be someone else.
The effortless girl who’s loved by everyone when she comes into the room.
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