To my father
(2013)
Something whispers, certainly not nothing. A subtle impetus to choose to stir and rise
You play your cards so well. Looks like you’ve had a lot of pra… You seem to have a thorough grasp of all the rules of the game. As you cover every angle,
I hide here behind a genuine misbelief that I am special, I am different I and only I
The storm is brewing. I smell it in the air. I am panicking. I can barely breathe. I fear this tempest
This trembling grief is for a long lost soul, a young, guileless child I once knew as me. I truly believed
There’s a furious raging mob out beyond the temple walls; howling with a lust for murder of the next contender for their cr… It's more to do with feral instinc…
I gaze into the bleakness of the e… engulfed by a sense of futility an… I am like the man who keeps fishin… though he knows the river is spent… I cast my line into the milky pool…
I dreamed of being lost and trappe… in a land of angry fearful liars. There was nowhere to run or hide. I cowered cornered and exhausted, my back against the furthest wall;
Your unexpected words of kindness fell upon this desert dweller’s arid heart
Been wasting away in this hovel for too many days to count; wishing, hoping, scheming, sometimes even praying, for any way to get out.
It’s only you that I can trust to hear these words as true. Those I know seem blinded by some notion or another about me. You are my closest confidant
I see no reason now to disguise this naked heart and soul of mine. You can hide there
These words, gently laid upon this page, amount to my sincere prayer they reach within you, and touch your secret self,
I hold truth as the highest princi… I am a liar. I value honesty over all else. I am a thief. I expect integrity from you.
Beloved goddess, sweet holy mother of us all, you who beckon me throughout these hectic days