To my father
(2013)
Beloved goddess, sweet holy mother of us all, you who beckon me throughout these hectic days
That cranky old mongrel hound cooped up down the alley; he ain’t got no teeth no more but he still knows how to snarl. he gets them young pups all worked…
It was in those early days when everything seemed technicolor there was that explosion only inward then nothing
These words, are just what they’re meant to be; for you, whatever needs they serve to stir… For me;
Your unexpected words of kindness fell upon this desert dweller’s arid heart
I commit myself to God; sometimes, not often. I believe in God; sometimes,
Listen. There it is. The hum of perfect silence at the centre of all that is, and isn’t.
I dreamed of being lost and trappe… in a land of angry fearful liars. There was nowhere to run or hide. I cowered cornered and exhausted, my back against the furthest wall;
I read such woeful words penned by a fallen brother; his message cut me deeply. He prayed to all that’s holy that he might cry again.
My beloved, she has abandoned me. What’s left is a stark white canva… that repels application of hue or… Hopelessly, I gaze into the bleak… She is gone,
I’m not really here right now. I can only be here when no-one’s a… and I know no-one can see me. Even when i speak to you, I’m sort of not really here.
Sweet sultry muse, I declare this solemn oath before all that’s true and holy, that this earthly life and love are yours and yours alone,
I am awash with tears of mourning for what I thought was dead and go… as though a flood of holy water has broken through the stony dam I contrived to spare this brittle…
My father has come to dinner; He does not knock. He is not welcome. He is dead. Yet he insists on joining me
I met a man who told me that he’s looking for the way he might become more free, less encumbered in his life. Poor me, poor me, poor me;