Tokyo Olympics
I would have gone to Tokyo to represent the United States in the Olympics, but I was too fast, too strong, and too powerful. I would have smoked all the rest of the athletes. I have too kind of a heart. I hate to belittle people. These athletes trained hard all their lives, and it would have been to mean of me to out perform them. I’m not saying that I’m the greatest, but come to think of it, I am.
I out ran all the turtles in my neighborhood. I swam faster than all the elephants. I out lifted one of the residents of St.Mary’s Home of the Infirmed. I slam dunked over my friend Sam’s seven year old grand-daughter Suzie. Then I knocked out her twin brother Louie. I jumped over a pair of old sneakers. I almost made it to the top of the balance beam. I would have won the bicycle race but I couldn’t make the bike stay upright. Since I accomplished all of these feats, I would have been well qualified to represent the USA in the Olympics.
But since I was too over qualified, I chose to veg out, sit on the couch, have a beer and some chips, and watch it on the TV. America won more medals than everybody else anyway. Just think. If I was there, we would have won all the gold.
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