Man Alive!
There Can Only Ever Be One G.O.A.T.
Inside the hierarchy
Humiliation is both a warning
That there are no individuals without the group
And a reminder
That your place in the group is at the bottom
But after bottoming out
This bottom dweller knew
It was time to get out
I just needed an in
With the outsiders
And as the door hit me on the way out
It hit me–
I knew one of these outsiders
And, being my wife
She was exactly what I needed
To get my foot in the door
But before opening the door to let me in
The outsiders asked me the very same question
That God asks them each and every day:
Are you all in?
Being prone to long answers
I said the following:
“Though loving my wife
Had proven my final humiliation
With the inside crowd
It also proved that by
Having it in for the outsiders
As their scapegoats,
The inside crowd still has no idea
That the outsiders have an in
With the Greatest Of All Time
As the G.O.A.T.’s most dedicated fans
I only know this because I have
The greatest wife of all time
And I’m not ashamed to say it”
It took me two years to say all of that
Until at last the door was ajar
And while it may look like
I’m now on the outside looking in,
Take a closer look:
The inner child
Is now an outdoorsman
Unsurprisingly, I’ve noticed that
Quite a few of the great outdoorsmen
Have long beards
