One would be in less danger From the wiles of a stranger If one’s own kin and kith Were more fun to be with.

O all ye exorcizers come and exorcize now, and ye clergymen draw nigh and clerge, For I wish to be purged of an urge. It is an irksome urge, compounded of nettles and glue, And it is...

In fourteen hundred and ninety-two… Someone sailed the ocean blue. Somebody borrowed the fare in Spa… For a business trip on the boundin… And to prove to the people, by act…

They tell me that euphoria is the… well, today I feel euphorian, Today I have the agility of a Gre… Victorian. Yes, today I may even go forth wi…

Husbands are things that wives have to get used to putting up with. And with whom they breakfast with and sup with. They interfere with the discipline of nurseries, They ...

A child need not be very clever To learn that “Later, dear” means…

I test my bath before I sit, And I’m always moved to wondermen… That what chills the finger not a… Is so frigid upon the fundament.

Consider the auk; Becoming extinct because he forgot… Consider man, who may well become… Because he forgot how to walk and…

How pleasant to sit on the beach, On the beach, on the sand, in the… With ocean galore within reach, And nothing at all to be done! No letters to answer,

The summer like a rajah dies, And every widowed tree Kindles for Congregationalist eye… An alien suttee.

So Thomas Edison Never drank his medicine; So Blackstone and Hoyle Refused cod-liver oil; So Sir Thomas Malory

I give you now Professor Twist, A conscientious scientist, Trustees exclaimed, “He never bun… And sent him off to distant jungle… Camped on a tropic riverside,

Who wants my jellyfish? I’m not sellyfish!

I sit in an office at 244 Madison… And say to myself You have a resp… Why then do you fritter away your… If you have a sore throat you can… If you have a sore foot you can ge…