No Doctor’s Today, Thank You, by Ogden Nash

Ogden Nash

No Doctor’s Today, Thank You

They tell me that euphoria is the feeling of feeling wonderful,

well, today I feel euphorian,

Today I have the agility of a Greek god and the appetitite of a

Victorian.

Yes, today I may even go forth without my galoshes,

Today I am a swashbuckler, would anybody like me to buckle

any swashes?

This is my euphorian day,

I will ring welkins and before anybody answers I will run away.

I will tame me a caribou

And bedeck it with marabou.

I will pen me my memoirs.

Ah youth, youth! What euphorian days them was!

I wasn’t much of a hand for the boudoirs,

I was generally to be found where the food was.

Does anybody want any flotsam?

I’ve gotsam.

Does anybody want any jetsam?

I can getsam.

I can play chopsticks on the Wurlitzer,

I can speak Portuguese like a Berlitzer.

I can don or doff my shoes without tying or untying the laces because

I am wearing moccasins,

And I practically know the difference between serums and antitoccasins.

Kind people, don’t think me purse-proud, don’t set me down as

vainglorious,

I’m just a little euphorious.

#Americans #XXCentury

Enjoyed this read? Treat us to a coffee!.
Your help allows us to exist.

Other works by Ogden Nash...

Kind of an Ode to Duty

O Duty, Why hast thou not the visage of a… Why displayest thou the countenanc… conscientious organizing spinster That the minute you see her you ar…

Further Reflections on Parsley

Parsley Is gharsley.

The Squab

Toward a better world I contribut… I eat the squab, lest it become a…

Tableau at Twilight

I sit in the dusk. I am all alone… Enter a child and an ice-cream con… A parent is easily beguiled By sight of this coniferous child. The friendly embers warmer gleam,

The Termite

Some primal termite knocked on woo… And tasted it, and found it good! And that is why your Cousin May Fell through the parlor floor toda…

A Tale of the Thirteenth Floor

The hands of the clock were reachi… In an old midtown hotel; I name no name, but its sordid fam… Is table talk in hell. I name no name, but hell’s own fla…

The Canary

The song of canaries Never varies, And when they’re moulting They’re pretty revolting.

Lines on Facing Forty

I have a bone to pick with fate, Come here and tell me girly, Do you think my mind is maturing l… Or simply rotting early.

The Sunset Years of Samuel Shy

Master I may be, But not of my fate. Now come the kisses, too many too… Tell me, O Parcae, For fain would I know,

Song to Be Sung by the Father of Infant Female Children

My heart leaps up when I behold A rainbow in the sky; Contrariwise, my blood runs cold When little boys go by. For little boys as little boys,

À Bas Ben Adhem

My fellow man I do not care for. I often ask me, What’s he there f… The only answer I can find Is, Reproduction of his kind. If I’m supposed to swallow that,

The Jellyfish

Who wants my jellyfish? I’m not sellyfish!

Lines to Be Embroidered on a Bib or the Child Is Father of the Man, But Not for Quite a While

So Thomas Edison Never drank his medicine; So Blackstone and Hoyle Refused cod-liver oil; So Sir Thomas Malory

I Never Even Suggested It

I know lots of men who are in love… And to fall out with their loved o… They are conciliatory at every opp… Because all they want is serenity… Yes, many the swain who has finall…

The Grackle

The grackle’s voice is less than m… His heart is black, his eye is yel… He bullies more attractive birds With hoodlum deeds and vulgar word… And should a human interfere,

Looks like your ad blocker is on.

We rely on ads to keep creating quality content for you to enjoy for free.

Please support our site by disabling your ad blocker.

Choose your Ad Blocker

Adblock Plus
Adblock
Adguard
Ad Remover
Brave
Ghostery
uBlock Origin
uBlock
UltraBlock
Other

In the extension bar, click the AdBlock Plus icon
Click the large blue toggle for this website
Click refresh

In the extension bar, click the AdBlock icon
Under "Pause on this site" click "Always"

In the extension bar, click on the Adguard icon
Click on the large green toggle for this website

In the extension bar, click on the Ad Remover icon
Click "Disable on This Website"

In the extension bar, click on the orange lion icon
Click the toggle on the top right, shifting from "Up" to "Down"

In the extension bar, click on the Ghostery icon
Click the "Anti-Tracking" shield so it says "Off"
Click the "Ad-Blocking" stop sign so it says "Off"
Refresh the page

In the extension bar, click on the uBlock Origin icon
Click on the big, blue power button
Refresh the page

In the extension bar, click on the uBlock icon
Click on the big, blue power button
Refresh the page

In the extension bar, click on the UltraBlock icon
Check the "Disable UltraBlock" checkbox
Marque la casilla de verificación "Desactivar UltraBlock"

Please disable your Ad Blocker
Disable any DNS blocking tools such as AdGuardDNS or NextDNS

If the prompt is still appearing, please disable any tools or services you are using that block internet ads (e.g. DNS Servers).

Ogden Nash