jotting down my thoughts trying to make sense of it all shaking hands stiff fingers i cannot even self soothe anymore

i’m always repressing my urges to scream to bash my head into the wall to cry in the shower set to its ho… i hope one day they realize

tear me limb from limb turn me to dust my life impacts no one why do i exist? i am disappointing

i have weeds growing from my skin i am one with earth and still feeling unnatural i sit, water pours i am blooming

i have been trying so hard to heal stuck in the past, despite my effo… life in the sun felt so good i only wish that i could have stay… wandering aimlessly now that i was

if i died in my room, whether it were an accident or int… how long would it take for you to… everything is about you, you, you so where does that leave me?

it is so incredibly draining to feel so passionless. i just want to feel useful interesting

i love you more than i ever though… you fell into my life when i didn’t expect a thing you fell into my life when i needed you most

always been taught to prioritize other people’s pain over my own trained selfish if i speak about myself at… supposed to normalize anger

i cannot rest my heavy eyes due to… and no matter how hard i try and t… you’re always there laughing as if you belong if only you’d visit me in the fles…

i hope that every time that you see this shade of green it drives you mad i hope that every time that you hear a laugh like mine

there is a creature that is living inside of me– a parasite that feeds on hatred and pain. i promise it isn’t my fault.

i want it to work so badly but i don’t think it ever will unfortunately i am putting too much effort in once again

my mind is loud tonight, i am struggling to sift through it… overwhelmed by every detail. feel like i don’t exist feel like i am replaceable

i feel... “okay” really that means i’ve been dissoc… it means distracted it means ignoring what upsets me it means crying less,