THINGS I NEED
More
than anything
I need time.
Secondarily:
I need a new liver.
I need new lungs.
I need a new bladder
I need new teeth.
and I am
woefully behind
on the latest
firmware update.
I need
a solid state
prefrontal cortex.
I need a
super computer
with bluetooth connectivity
to bridge the
blood-brain barrier
and jack into the tired
pathways of
my cerebrum.
I need
a house
with windows facing
a dark empty street
where disquiet
is double-parked.
I need to
focus more sharply
in darkness.
I remind
myself to translate
the cadence of a million years
when sage brush birds
sing early in the
morning.
I need
the sun to give
me a break
and stop stalking me
when I go out
and confront
misgiving.
I need stars
to come forward
and identify
themselves.
I need socks.
I need a second pair of shoes.
I need a third pair of glasses.
I need four more books
I will never read.
I need
a bed without
a de-memorized
mattress
ill-disposed
toward the shape
of my body.
I need
light bulbs
to illuminate sadness
and turn it
yellow as a lemon.
I walk
and dance
on planks of
uncertainty
in my
sleep.
I need
time travel
and written permission
to go back and ask
the most beautiful girl
in high school
out on
a date.
I am
prepared to accept
and smile at
rejection.
I am
too worn
for all of this
and honestly
it needs to stop
right now.
Everything
needs to stop.
It might
next week
or when the sun
burns out
or more likely
when I finally stop
pushing down
on the
keys of this
machine.
