When Homer stubs his toe or bumps his elbow, the pain is always piercing but Homer’s a pious man so swearing isn’t for him.

Some women use perfume and that’s fine. Some don’t and that’s fine too. Over the years

My father never talked much about religion but he went to Mass every Sunday, the 6:30 Mass where few people would be and he wouldn’t have to deal with friends and neighbors. His contrib...

The blind artist paints life as he wants it to be a tranquil sky a big sun smiling everyone laughing.

Planned Parenthood surgeons deplored the murder of Cecil the Lion. They wonder how a

My wife’s upset because I won’t answer the phone in the middle of the night even though the phone’s on my side of the bed.

Smitty isn’t Schulte. He doesn’t drive a Cadillac and doesn’t hit his wife often any more. Schulte, on the other hand,

I should have said yes, meet you anywhere you want for lunch, even that greasy spoon with the lousy chili and corn dogs… Every five years or so we meet

I told my wife the other night when she came back to bed my feet were cold so now’s the time for me to tell her not to bury me or burn me

They buried Colleen Garrity today a woman 95 few people thought would ever die and what a lovely eulogy her cousin Paddy gave. Paddy must be 80 if a day yet he

The scruffy old man and his white poodle on a long red leash were neighborhood icons years ago down at the corner

Departures from the norm we are. Not just you and me but

Next to me on the train going home to the suburbs is another guy stuck in a suit reading his paper, a normal-looking guy

He’s at least 70 now and has never forgotten his childhood. He lives with that child every day… He remembers that Thanksgiving Da… his family had parched field corn

Never speak ill of the dead, his father always said, and his father was a pastor who preached from the pulpit. That’s why whenever