You know how I know I’ve loved?
Because I’ve been hurt.
By the same person that I love.
The key to love is learning how to be devastated.
Building your immunity to heartache and inexplicable pain.
Deep love... is excruciating.
You know how I know I’ve loved?
I’ve been disappointed.
By the same person who I put my faith in.
Oh, yes.
I’ve loved.
Once a safe haven for butterflies,
now occupied by words I’ve swallowed.
Feelings I’ve repressed.
You know how I know I’ve loved?
I’ve compromised who I was.
For the same person I believed I could be myself with.
Incessant breaking,
contorting,
altering.
Have I gotten your picture?
You know how I know I’ve loved?
Because I’ve stayed.
Even though there’s been countless opportunities for me to leave.
I’ve loved, alright.
Past my set limits, I’ve loved.
But, I don’t love him enough to make me miserable.
I love him enough to remain disconsolate.