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Robert L. Martin

Faith in Doubt

Faith in Doubt

The championship was within reach as the Tigers drove the ball down to the twenty yard line with only four seconds to go.  Down 24 to 20, they couldn’t kick a field goal, so they had to get a touchdown.  It would be the last play of the game, so Jones had only one more shot at it.
Thomas, the tight end fell down on purpose, so the secondary left him alone.  The two wide receivers ran into the end zone with tight coverage.  After Thomas got up, he was running all alone at the three yard line.  Jones spotted him, but the ball went behind him and landed on the ground.  Time ran out as the Tigers went down in defeat.
After the game, amid all the booing, Jones was seen crying on the bench.  The reporters couldn’t wait to interview him, so they ran over and stuck their microphones in his face.  He didn’t even look up, because he was too ashamed of himself.  His voice was all broken up.  
“Thomas was all alone at the three.  I had plenty of time to throw to him, but I missed him.  If I would have let God be in control, it would have been different.  After all, it was he who got me to this game in the first place.  He gave me the confidence and the ability to reach my potential.  By not acknowledging it, I relied on my own self, that inferior self that made me doubt my capabilities.  Instead of relaxing and letting the ball go, I hesitated and aimed it.  While the ball was in my hand, I started to think that I couldn’t do it, in defiance of God’s control.  He knows that I could do it, but I didn’t.  Since he had faith in me, why shouldn’t I have faith in myself, also?   I know better than that.  It is my fault that we lost the game.
Deep down inside me lies two internal wills, my own and God’s.  God’s will is the voice inside that keeps shouting at me, “Full steam ahead.”  Mine is the one disrupted by doubt.  Since I was created to be this “Herculean man” who acknowledges God’s will in me to keep the faith in myself and strive toward my potential, I relied on my own will to do it.”
The newspapers the next day said, “Jones was a disgrace to the team.  They should get another quarterback who is capable of winning the big game.”  They didn’t say anything what he said about God’s will in the interview.  
Jones, a religious man, knows what he did wrong.  He knows how to right his wrongs.  The reporters, who always look for the deficiencies in man, are capable of righting their wrongs, but choose not to.  How can you sell newspapers if the people would rather hear negative things about mankind?
When Thomas, the tight end, was in the clear, Jones’s faith in himself was in doubt.  That unsure feeling let his reasoning cause the ball to sail on him.  God bless him.

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