For Mum.
Just a simple thank you. Thank you for guiding me. For always being there, waiting. Greeting me.
The words spoken By them. Knowingly sly and spiteful. So cold. So calculated.
Staying afloat, I’m ripped down again. Into the deepest abyss. With notice
The peace you brought, It was misleading. Unknowingly, You sneak up, With your hypnotic dance.
Dull, Worn, Scratched, And torn. An antique soul,
Watching the world. Paper, Plastic, Celebrity, Religion.
Emptiness. A void in his very being He tries to fill. Drugs, sex,
A lifetime given, To a life now taken. A love now silenced, Will be forever deafening.
The love, The hatred, Going in circles. Like a train on set tracks, Around and around.
48 years of beautiful life, ended. 23 years of knowing you, ended. 13 years of caring for you,
Venturing into the unknown. The mind stops, terrified. Yet; the heart pushes forward, ever curious and hopeful.
When you left, Your voice was always there. In the house, On the street. Everywhere.
Cowardice. Seeking comfort from chemicals. Not facing what I ought to face, Terrified. “..I was blind, but now I see..”
Take this. This gift. An escape. Ever silent, Ever painless.
Learning to swim Uncharted waters; The walls. Barriers, Built over years.