i you she your heart with had body when can feel from how eyes love alone again go pain leaves all but peace off clothes let matter long who hiding afraid smell arms ask give letting high reality hole least phone close just blue beauty warmth time relationship out trying over feelings connect desperately something heat connection felt away feeling get seen real mask fact sterile tone silenced words one see softening sparkling gaze each other sit clean overwhelmed wrap around myself soothe ache poor substitute needed hot affection longing spilling flowing outward toward only night god help take painful desire obsession consumed thoughts dreams surfed upon since spring weighing highs lows rejection stabbing aching loneliness experienced rarely hanging crumbs hope gathering artifacts ground left fractured manufactured tricked brain raced artificially dug chest sobbed quietly sympathetic friend first step later dark appreciated dull replacement fantasy not numb living perpetual state anesthesia existence before loving someone heals wounds now closing memories fading dulling numbness spreading once enormous fill tears almost still baby needing reassurance mom comfort home soft couch blanket pillow warm dog feet swirl scatter outside window chicken soup simmers turn television ipad quiet listen own beat caged birds chirping crisp churning ocean waves across lawn stand disconnect consuming addictions noticed liked look inside grey windows guarded soul stares intently being listener mother helper lifting heavy bags holding doors always making sure everyone feels welcome valued encouraging smile genuine care baggy worn fringe yet circle loved acceptance hearts company intelligent observer takes cuts through dead drawn blackout drapes everything beautiful light nothing whore house puts keep uses placate manipulate bad things disappointed exhausted humiliated disgusted will stop taking figure if burn pimping protect mind plays part sacrifices flesh while spirit soars freely unattached until glimpses naked mirror begins sob cry realize waned chase after touch gone washed tide roles play life staying character smothering any embers playing parts ve played too break free sun warms brave true self burned