There was an old man who felt pert When he wore a pale rose-coloured… When they said ‘Is it pleasant?’ He cried 'Not at present— It’s a little to short—is my shirt…

There was an Old Man of Whitehav… Who danced a quadrille with a rave… But they said, 'It’s absurd To encourage this bird!' So they smashed that Old Man of…

There was an Old Man with a beard… Who said, "It is just as I feared… Two Owls and a Hen, four Larks a… Have all built their nests in my b…

There was an Old Person of Dutto… Whose head was as small as a butto… So, to make it look big, He purchased a wig, And rapidly rushed about Dutton.

There was Old Man in a pew, Whose waistcoat was spotted with b… But he tore it in pieces To give to his nieces, That cheerful Old Man in a pew.

There was an Old Person of Ems, Who casually fell in the Thames; And when he was found They said he was drowned, That unlucky Old Person of Ems

There was an Old Man in a tree, Who was horribly bored by a bee. When they said “Does it buzz?” He replied “Yes, it does! It’s a regular brute of a bee!”

There was an Old Person of Chead… Who was put in the stocks by the b… For stealing some pigs, Some coats, and some wigs, That horrible person of Cheadle.

There was an old person of Nice, Whose associates were usually Gee… They walked out together, in all s… That affable person of Nice!

There was a Young Lady of Wellin… Whose praise all the world was a-t… She played on a harp, And caught several carp, That accomplished Young Lady of…

There was a Young Lady of Portug… Whose ideas were excessively nauti… She climbed up a tree, To examine the sea, But declared she would never leave…

There was an Old Man with a owl, Who continued to bother and howl; He sat on a rail And imbibed bitter ale, Which refreshed that Old Man and…

There was an Old Man who said, ‘… Will nobody answer this bell? I have pulled day and night, Till my hair has grown white, But nobody answers this bell!’

There was an Old Man of Melrose, Who walked on the tips of his toes… But they said, 'It ain’t pleasant… To see you at present, You stupid Old Man of Melrose.