The doctor gets you when you’re bo… The preacher, when you marry, And the lawyer lurks with costly c… If too much on you carry. Professional men, they have no car…

The firefly’s flame Is something for which science has… I can think of nothing eerier Than flying around with an unident… person’s posteerier.

Adam Had’em

I give you now Professor Twist, A conscientious scientist, Trustees exclaimed, “He never bun… And sent him off to distant jungle… Camped on a tropic riverside,

The cow is of bovine ilk; One end is moo, the other is milk.

Now when I have a cold I am careful with my cold, I consult a physician And I do as I am told. I muffle up my torso

Higgledy piggledy, my black hen, She lays eggs for gentlemen. Gentlemen come every day To count what my black hen doth la… If perchance she lays too many,

Oh, “rorty” was a mid-Victorian w… Which meant “fine, splendid, jolly… And often to me it has reoccurred In moments melancholy. For instance, children, I think i…

Peekabo, I Almost See You Middle-aged life is merry, and I… But there comes a day when your ey… And your friends get jocular, so y… And of all your friends he is the…

May I join you in the doghouse, R… I wish to retire till the party’s… Since three o’clock I’ve done my… To entertain each tiny guest. My… And if they want me, let them find…

He who is ridden by a conscience Worries about a lot of nonscience; He without benefit of scruples His fun and income soon quadruples…

Bound to your bookseller, leap to… Deluge your dealer with bakshish a… Lean on the counter and never say… Wodehouse and Wooster are with us… Flourish the fish-slice, your butt…

I didn’t go to church today, I trust the Lord to understand. The surf was swirling blue and whi… The children swirling on the sand. He knows, He knows how brief my s…