Indigo love
Did I ever really feel love? Was I just in love with an idealised version of you, a person who never really existed? I needed to feel love so badly I painted a picture in my mind of who you should be, not the person you actually were, not letting myself see the flaws . This beautiful, kind, intelligent creature, my perfect guy . How could I not fall for you? I allowed my self to freefall into this stupid love, arms outstretched, I fell into you . Immersed in your essence, your world, your dreams and desires became mine . Although I knew deep inside, all of this was so very wrong, this compulsive, possessive emotion drew me along, like a demon, dragging my soul into the depths of hell .And now, all these years later, I am alone with the memory of this malevolent emotion, like an entity it possesses me still, bringing me to tears in the dark, indigo night ...
(2014)
