I opened my eyes And looked up at the rain And it dripped into my head And flowed into my brain So pardon this wild crazy thing I…

I made myself a snowball As perfect as could be. I thought I’d keep it as a pet And let it sleep with me. I made it some pajamas

Hey boys you know once I was took… And the first time that I wasn’t… But I’m an ingenious feller yeah… I tiptoed right down to my cellar… Oh her arms are iron her legs are…

Policeman, policeman, Help me please. Someone went and stole my knees. I’d chase him down but I suspect My feet and legs just won’t connec…

(Hey the truth might hurt so I’m… Hey you better not ask me where I… Why my eyes are shinin’ and my spi… You better not ask if I been doin… And you better not ask me bout the…

I knew that she belonged to someon… But lonesome-lookin’ women are a w… And so I bought that stuff about… And I figured I would love her so… But just when I got up to leave,…

The waitress with the orange hair… I gulp my coffee– burn my mouth– g… I smear a streak of mustard down m… And the guy behind the register ta… And looks at me as if I’ve blown…

Last night, while I lay thinking… some Whatifs crawled inside my ear and pranced and partied all night… and sang their same old Whatif son… Whatif I’m dumb in school?

He rode through the woods on a big… He had fists as hard as choppin’ b… Five hundred pounds and nine feet… Talk about workin’, when he swung… You could hear it ring for a mile…

‘A genuine anteater,’ The pet man told my dad. Turned out, it was an aunt eater, And now my uncle’s mad!

I went to the doctor– He reached down my throat, He pulled out a shoe And a little toy boat, He pulled out a skate

She’s a liberated lady and she’s l… And she don’t need your protection… And she does not want your help. And if you’re lookin’ for some pre… You better go look somewhere else,

Sandra’s seen a leprechaun, Eddie touched a troll, Laurie danced with witches once, Charlie found some goblins’ gold. Donald heard a mermaid sing,