Three widows of the Middle West We’re grimly chewing gum; The Lido chef a quail had dressed With garlic and with rum, And they were painfully oppressed

‘Ave you seen Bill’s mug in the N… ‘E’s gyned the Victoriar Cross, t… Little Bill wot would grizzle and… If you ‘it ’im a swipe on the jawr… ‘E’s slaughtered the Kaiser’s men…

Addict of Punch and Judy shows I was when I was small; My kiddy laughter, I suppose, Rang louder than them all. The Judge with banter I would bai…

My flask of wine was ruby red And swift I ran my sweet to see; With eyes that snapped delight I… “How mad with love a lad can be!” The moon was laughing overhead;

‘Come, see,’ said he, ‘my four—foo… A forty volume row; And every one I wrote myself, But that, of course, you know.’ I stared, I searched a memory dim…

Mary and I were twenty—two When we were wed; A well—matched pair, right smart t… The town’s folk said. For twenty years I have been true

A very humble pen I ply Beneath a cottage thatch; And in the sunny hours I try To till my cabbage patch; And in the gloaming glad am I

Come out, O Little Moccasins, an… Come out, O tiny beaded feet, and… I’ll play the old Red River reel,… Awake, O Little Moccasins, and d… Your hair was all a gleamy gold, y…

Unpenitent, I grieve to state, Two good men stood by heaven’s gat… Saint Peter coming to await. The stopped the Keeper of the Key… Saying: “What suppliants are thes…

“Let’s make him a sailor,” said F… “And he will adventure the sea.” “A soldier,” said Mother, “is rat… What I would prefer him to be.” “A lawyer,” said Father, “would p…

She phoned them when the Round wa… ‘How is my Joe?’ they heard her s… They answered: 'Gee! He’s going g… Your guy’s Okay.' She phoned them when the Round wa…

When we might make with happy hear… This world a paradise, With bombs we blast brave men apar… With napalm carbonize. Where we might till the sunny soil…

Three gentlemen live close beside… A painter of pictures bizarre, A poet whose virtues might guide m… A singer who plays the guitar; And there on my lintel is Cupid;

A Wintertide we had been wed When Jan went off to sea; And now the laurel rose is red And I wait on the quay. His berthing boat I watch with dr…