Langston Hughes

Madam and the Phone Bill

You say I O.K.ed
LONG DISTANCE?
O.K.ed it when?
My goodness, Central
That was then!
 
I’m mad and disgusted
With that Negro now.
I don’t pay no REVERSED
CHARGES nohow.
 
You say, I will pay it—
Else you’ll take out my phone?
You better let
My phone alone.
 
I didn’t ask him
To telephone me.
Roscoe knows darn well
LONG DISTANCE
Ain’t free.
 
If I ever catch him,
Lawd, have pity!
Calling me up
From Kansas City.
 
Just to say he loves me!
I knowed that was so.
Why didn’t he tell me some’n
I don’t know?
 
For instance, what can
Them other girls do
That Alberta K. Johnson
Can’t do—and more, too?
 
What’s that, Central?
You say you don’t care
Nothing about my
Private affair?
 
Well, even less about your
PHONE BILL, does I care!
 
Un—humm—m! . . . Yes!
You say I gave my O.K.?
Well, that O.K. you may keep—
 
But I sure ain’t gonna pay!
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