The Knife In My Chest
Wounded and empty
I sit and think of the knife in my chest
Of the one I love
The one who put it there
And the only one who can remove it
So all day I sit and watch alone
As you live
As you breath
As you move on so perfectly
All day I sit and watch
And ever turn the knife in my chest
As people assure me that it can be healed
As I nod and agree
And secretly yearn for only one
Wishing I could go back
And stay in the beautiful days
Were we shared the same love
And secretly yearn for your weight in my arms
Wishing I could hold you one last time
And never let you go
And secretly yearn for something to change
Wishing I could tell someone of the pain
And they sit and listen with a caring face
And secretly yearn for you to return
Wishing for regained love and joyous tears
And never go back to the way things are
But I know things are forever changed
When the day ends
As I lay in my bed
I stare into the eyes of the ceiling
And it stares back with a blank face
I tell it of the knife in my chest
Of the pain in my heart
Of my longing to rest
As it silently nods and agrees
My ceiling the one left to comfort me
I try to remember that I’m trying to forget
As I lay awake recalling every late night talk
Every struggle I went through for you
And knowing every effort was in vain
I would do it again, even if it ended the same
I would do it again, even if in the end it couldn’t be changed
I would do it again, even if you treated me this way
And I turn the knife in my chest and cry
'Til slumber calls my name
And I find you in my dreams
Everything is unchanged
You smile an you call my name
You kiss my face
And hold my hand
There’s no knife in my chest
You hold me and love me
You take care of me
Then I awake taunted by dreams with a knife in my chest.
