Almost every student prefers and l… But will almost always take the vi… Because those classes are always e…

Everybody knows that Jews are indigenous to Israe… that they were frogmarched out into the oft-deadly diaspora by th… and that they have openly and

The answer man is left with a ques… What does a woman want? The question woman is stuck with a… A good man is hard to find but eas…

As an individual human being I could never really know who you think I am so, I had to imagine it But as a networked cyborg

I used to believe that if no one was unwanted there would be no more Wanted post… Now I think that because we can never stop wanting

As the Zamboni driver erasing everything that just happe… so it can all happen again I am preparing for my own death

The stapler inevitably jams And it’s always the stapler That jams the copier Except for the times it jams When you try to copy something you…

If I were going to rephrase the O… I’d say I believe in God because There’s no better explanation And if I were going to re-explain…

You cannot beat God in any sport but you can tie Him in bowling

My dad was a very religious man He always told me You’ve made your bed now you’ve got to not eat in it

When they closed all the beaches my dad said not to worry and I just knew he’d install the swimming pool I’d always wante… Instead, I came home from school

It wasn’t false modesty exactly You might call it un-unpretentious if you were being pretentious

Women give hints So that men will think It was their idea I’ve never been good at taking a h… But I’m good at following orders

God already knows Where this is all going But it’s up to all of us How we get there

When I got to the front of the self-checkout line I assumed there’d be a mirror but to my surprise and delight it was even better than I’d hoped