In the new version of Heads I win, tails you lose People hate to be wrong But love to apologize And if you accept their apology
X marks the spot where cyborgs will receive their o– ver-the-air updates
I was always afraid to admit I knew they would knife me in the… Until I came to fear God Which is how I know He has my back
The fruit of the tree of knowledge… Has fully ripened In the form of the internet Which looms large With the promise of looming catast…
Tired of my pre-contemplation phas… God sent me my wife Who Contemplated me during the honeymo… Prepared me for fatherhood
When I sallied forth to share my… just one voice in the wild multipl… They told me to go fly a kite; it seemed that’s just life in the… Then I recalled as it began to ta…
All words are defined by other words except for God’s rule
Life = Trial by fire Death = Trial by firing squad
Woe betide the man who accepts an apology
The world is An interrogation room And God is behind The two-way mirror
In this world The greatest pleasure Is always anticipation: Moshiach is coming!
The internet is the opposite of th… When a memory is repressed you get it back even though you can’t remember it But when it is memory-holed
You’ve always dressed to impress But it’s only since social media That you can use your appearance To exact compulsory service
In a twist in hell there are no consequences
I may not be deep but I compensate for it by getting deep into the weeds