I may not be the man who has everything but I’m the man who knows what to get for the man who has everything

When I die I’m go– ing to donate my body to pseudoscience

First, we learn how to walk Then we learn how to walk away For many of us This takes the rest of our lives But if we never give up

Unsatisfied with the miracle of li… Peaceful transfer of power in serv… The peace movement plans to establ… A mostly peaceful monopoly on powe…

You can spend your life trying to understand why bad things happen to good people only to learn that good people do bad things

The devil is a man for all occasio… Because we always have a choice To rise to the bait But God created man By giving him a choice

The distant past– Strong enough for a man, pH balan… The recent past– Strong enough for a woman The present–

When people give you the silent treatment have them put it in writing

It takes talent to write a hit pie… but anyone can write a puff piece that in thirty years will read as a hit piece

I’m not afraid of rejection– Life is a series of rejections Until you learn that Life goes on I’m afraid of abject humiliation

Inasmuch as handling gold is always a thorny affair all gold is rose gold but black gold

I had just started explaining smar… When the alien stopped me in mid-s… And explained smart phones to me Originally, in order to monitor an… They were just going to attach

In the new version of Heads I win, tails you lose People hate to be wrong But love to apologize And if you accept their apology

A civilization can die From a variety of causes– Famine, conquest, madness, etc. In succumbing to boredom Ours will be the first

Human beings have always used the symbolic to navigate the real; until recently we did so by imagining that the symbolic is rea… whereas scientists imagine that