Jews have learned the hard way How to discern when someone has Failed to earn their F for failin… The tell is whenever a Jew just Living a life

I’ve now reached the age when anticipation con– sists of nostalgia

Being human beings Pacifists are just as obsessed With wielding power As everybody else And just as pathological as those

You have bathed in the Fountain o… Every time you wash off the sweat After a hard day’s work

My wife wears her heart on her sle… Yet remains a total mystery– How can she be so sure? I’m sure I don’t know But sure enough

He may have gotten away with mass… But at least we didn’t let him Get away with murder

When I got to the front of the self-checkout line I assumed there’d be a mirror but to my surprise and delight it was even better than I’d hoped

Meaning is inherent to language And language is inherent to human… So, meaning is inherent to us huma… What does this mean? That’s open to interpretation

There was a time when fools managed perceptions in order to manage reality, realists managed perceptions because they couldn’t manage reali…

What do you call a wolf in sheep’s clothing who believes you are what you wear? The ruling class

In school they put me in the gifted class but as one of my favorite teachers finally put it “There’s just something missing”

I was a bullshit artist until I realized a career as a bullshit scientist paid better

Optimists dance the two-step: It’s going to get worse before it gets better Pessimists plod

Don’t get mad, get to work Because the best revenge is living… And you would do well to Work with what you’ve got And what you’ve got

Everybody knows The pen is mightier than the sword But few understand That it’s because The pen is a lightsaber