An army marches on its stomach but it convoys on its internal combustion engine Still, the way to

I’ve never won an argument with my wife but since I learned to let her have the last word I’ve consistently covered the spre…

They say Believing that God has a plan for… Is a fantasy But unless you believe in God His plan for you is

My wife is a lot like God If God weren’t perfect Like Him, she’s my toughest criti… But also my fiercest champion

In His infinite wisdom God made the pen mightier than the… Which is why the internet’s first… Is the First Amendment It’s only once free speech and fre…

We are gathered around our phones Like little campfires And all we ever hear Are scary stories

If people tell you what they plan to do and you don’t believe them it’s because pretending they don’t really mean it

We treat life as if Postponing the inevitable When we should be busy Preparing for the inestimable

Men are from Mars Women are from everywhere else

Reasonable people can disagree By agreeing to disagree But unreasonable people Can’t disagree on anything So, they have to agree on everythi…

Actual justice consists of hearing both sides of the story in order to decide which side is in the right meaning that justice

We flatter ourselves that the prog… man vs. nature to man vs. man culminates in

You could say I tried stand-up but for the audience it was more like when the flight attendant demonstrates how to put on your own oxygen mask…

Your eyes are your tools For processing light But don’t trust the process– Trust the light

In the contest for your soul The devil has to play by God’s ru… You can’t ever get what you want Because you always become what you…