The cold war was a just war but a just war is still just war and war is hell

In a few years we’ll all look back on liberal democracy and fake laugh

The most surprising aspect of the… though perhaps it shouldn’t have b… was the amount of paperwork it gen…

No one seems to see (least of all me) that being all you can be isn’t about clutching superiority– it’s for abjuring mediocrity

But you will always get a second chance to make a false impression

We hit it off: she’d declawed her cats and I’d plucked my cacti’s needles

I told my daughter Let me give you some free advice: You get what you pay for And she said I don’t get it

Whether it’s a brute fact Or a gift from God We are free Is this fair? It depends on

As users of language we give off meaning the same way that plants as users of sunlight give off oxygen

In order to live I can’t die (but you can) In order to live and let live I must (eventually) die

I have just complet– ed my memoirs: One Hundred Years of Solid Food

Gaslight, gas bright First-class I seek tonight I wish I may I wish I might Have the wishful thought

You’ve met your femme fa– tale when you can’t stop wishful thinking about her

Domination is feudal But resistance seems futile And lo, we canoodle With the large standard poodle We all know as boodle

I didn’t know my own strength because my strength is in numbers But now I know that my greatest w… was wanting to be number one Fortunately, while it’s easy to ge…