This isn’t the best of all possible worlds but God does His best with what we give Him to work with

I finally realized that when Smokey Bear says Only you can prevent forest fires Only I really believe him

I used to stand on the moral high ground to look myself in the eye but now that I’ve plucked it out and thrown it away

You know the (re)normalization of… is in full swing when the New Yor… justifies its publication of a cro… in the shape of a swastika on the start date of Chanukah

Looking back on college it’s unclear if I was a party animal party mineral or party vegetable

Marriage is the only place I’m neither feature nor bug but both

Self-flattery will get you everywhere but there’s nowhere left to go

It turns out they were right when they removed the self-destruc… explaining You won’t be needing this anymore now that you have autocorrect

Meaning is inherent to language And language is inherent to human… So, meaning is inherent to us huma… What does this mean? That’s open to interpretation

To whom it may concern: Time travel is impossible

We used to be able to talk to each… About the world Because we could always say Present company excluded But now that every screen

They used to pay us A penny for our thoughts But then they realized We would pay them To think for us

You can die a million times Without a single ego death But one ego death is worth One God

AI is A nobody And I am Nobody’s fool

The kingdom of heaven is like a tr… where gentlemen may remove their h… while all others must