Yes, we have no bananas but we still need you to play second banana

I’ll never forget when a guy standing in his front yard confronted me about looking into parked car windows mistaking me for a car thief

It’s the odd couple that isn’t always trying to even the score

Thinking of happiness as the meaning of life is like thinking of sugar as the meaning of food

At the end of The Sorcerer’s App… as chaos reaches a crescendo the sorcerer appears just in time and sets things back in order Apprenticed to no one,

Peace is not the goal It is the byproduct of the goal The goal is obvious Which is why we can’t see it

Of course, the west Still thinks it’s the best And in the postmodern west The best is the worst Which is all well and good

When we were kids we liked to spell Mississippi out loud for fun but we never pronounced the S’s–

As the new Assistant to the Deput… your primary initial responsibilit… 1) Establishing détente between wo… and paleo dietary restriction fact… while maintaining the dining hall’…

I may have a way with words but the metaverse is fast doing away with words

I believe in God and I believe in liberalism The tension between these two beliefs

Quick Draw McGraw taught us that in the wild wild west it’s better… shoot first and ask questions late… But Quick Bluff McGruff the Cyb… knows that on the World Wide Web…

Denial was a lot easier when your head was in the clouds but your memories were stored on microfiche

If we insist It’s not a competition It becomes A war If we admit

In the new version of Heads I win, tails you lose People hate to be wrong But love to apologize And if you accept their apology